Ripped from Facebook

Alternate title: "My kids are hilarious."

Alternate, alternate title: "What did I do for entertainment before I had kids?"


Me: "Let's grab a granola bar for breakfast since we're late."
AK: "No! A granola bar is too short for me!"
Me: "Huh?"
AK: "It isn't tall enough to fill me up and I get hungry too quickly."

***

AK: "I'm scared of getting lost in the maid!" (aka, the corn maze on her field trip today.)

***

Ryan and Anna-Kate: "SURFABUNGA!!!" {while balancing on upside down xylophones}

***

Ryan: "Why did Darth Vaders mom name him such a silly name?"
Me: "Wanna know his real name? Anakin."
Ryan: "That's a silly middle name. Darth Anakin Vader. Crazy."

***

Anna-Kate: "Wanna know my favorite kind of bread? SHORTBREAD! It's so delicious!"

***

AK: "Mom, you aren't gonna believe this. If you go on your computer and push disneyjunior.com a whole bunch of shows comes on even quicker than tv! My friend Grace told me all about it. Can you even believe it?"

***

Anna-Kate: "Um, is 'just a second' as long as 'just a minute'?"

***

Anna-Kate: "I know where Robin Hood and Maid Miriam live".
Me "where?" (expecting either Sherwood Forest or England)
AK: "well mom, the rooster tells us, in Animal Kingdom and I want to go visit them next time we go to Disneyworld" (you know the rooster narrator who says "we here in the animal kingdom know how the story really happened..." LOL).

***

Ryan: "Look at that guy over there who brought his belly with him!" (on seeing our neighbor mowing his grass without his shirt on.)

***

Ryan: "I am full of it." Though true, he actually meant that his tummy was full. Ironic, no?

***

At church Ryan looked up, his eyes got huge and he pointed at our Pastor and whispered, "Mommy, LOOK! It's JESUS!"

***

Me:"Ryan when you do xyz you get a spanking. Why did you choose to disobey?"
Ryan:" oh. I LOVE spankings mama."
(in my head...I know you didn't just say that.)

***

Anna Kate told me Snow White was her favorite princess. When I asked her why she said, "well her prince is definitely the most handsome!".